jibba

brave_ulysses @ 2009-11-22T10:59:00

2009-11-22T15:59:42Z

life is rarely bad approaching thanksgiving time. so many different types of casseroles to look forward to.
school is beginning to get very fun. finally at fsu this coming semester, and will be back on scholarship. need to save money for picture frames. need to find moldy biology books with sweet pictures. kodak chrome?. it's very nice to live by yourself, my first true sanctuary, keeps me in the zone. i can make a carton of orange juice last three weeks. the grovestand kind. should purchase fruit more often. i'm beginning to lose sight of the distinction between fruits and vegetables (animal, vegetable, mineral,... fruit?)(is this plant vegetabling?). bell peppers are apparentally fruits. i should purchase more bell peppers.

memories of being in strange rooms. like cars passing in the dark, the light sifts through the blinds and sits in my skull; dances with old personal pictures, home movies of the thought of God, under old weather. warm rain on a bald head. i had my first root beer float in at least 5 years last night.

i've almost gotten to the balance i've been looking for these past months. i'm keeping school and money together, but i'm not being a dick, yeah! my memory is getting tighter. math is becoming very pretty. forrest and i are great friends again, like we were before he owed me money. and my relationship with my folks couldn't be better. but nate hasn't talked to me since i quit holiday shores. lol, it stings a bit to be missing out on touring with the evangelicals, but i'm ultimately where i want to be, especially academically. plus they'll be back soon and ryan and i will be playing ping pong again in no time. we should invite nate. i want to write with stone again, which is good, cause he's been ready for awhile. i really miss dickie gustafson. bittersweet is the balance, i suppose.

me and katie and ramey and alex all went and finally saw inglourious basterds for 2 bucks! excellent

brave_ulysses @ 2008-11-18T03:40:00

2008-11-18T09:21:48Z

the good cents in tally is the dankest shit. pre-politically correct text books everywhere! pretty pictures too. it's very fine to be able to purchase, for about 5 bucks, enough crap to fill up your station wagon.

but right now i'm in niceville. niceville's not for messing around. have been phoneless since nyc. dropped classes again, have by now mastered the withdrawal process. have given up pursuing some sort of career since i have no real experience in anything practical, so i'm just going to try and major in math and see if i can just blaze through a bachelor's and then not worry to worry about shit, perhaps just do shit. must make an appointment with doug, my mom's boss' boyfriend motorcyclist guidance counselor. oh god and now i'm unemployed. that should end in a sec, the secret is to just ceaselessly apply at every business ever and have no shame in what new salary, or duties, you might end up with. new leaf market is the goal, hopefully my friendship with ryan should help me with that. god damn class A electronics opens up my bass amp to fix a wiggly jiggly master volume pot only to tell me that everything fell apart? i really hope they're not raiding my shit. cheyne and i are making modern Guess Who? with trannies and bearded ladies and things. want to give it to my sis for xmas. should have enough money for electrics/water. mmm sam kelly, pretty. really want to start some musics with forrest, that guy can twerk some knobs, a sampling mad scientist. got to enroll soon. need to commit this spring, to a lot, but i'm weighing my future against perhaps building a badass gnome warrior on world of warcraft or something.

i didn't realize insomniac with dave attell still came on. not a bad show, it's no quantum leap, though.

really, what the fuck?

2008-10-25T09:04:22Z

it's weird being in the city, that melting pot that defines our entire elementary/middle school perception of this goodness gracious america. the showcase is tonight, band's sounding tight. pretty anxious, it'll be good. wish stone and jared and david were here, but it's going great regardless. our second and final flight, that brought us into the city, was amazing, the city appearing as some great circuit board, also reminded me vaguely(sp?) of graham crackers(the damn plane charg1ed for food, so no food, however i did get a hot dog with cole slaw on it in memphis). first show went great, but i left my phone at the venue, don pedros. second show sucked, the sound man was a real dumbass, soundchecked at one volume then cut us off during the first song to tell us to turn down, kept doing it; he must've gave up after awhile cause the next band was much louder. the other night we went to The Plum, great gay bar. the most outstanding/classic queen i've ever seen. there was a dwarf lady sitting beside the queen who summoned me(really nate) but i pretended i didn't notice. boys making out(two in particular looked like twins!), sleazy old asian men, fun. drew's friend sophia got us into a great three-tiered club crazy tonight,called the annex. i was wiggling and some girls came around and we danced with them for a few hours, but after too many free drinks i thought i was about to pass out, got water, got leaving, drew seemed mad cause he was really into this brunette, who left when her blonde friend left when i left left right, but we were being silly anyways. got a cab to a street close to where we're staying, walked towards the place a bit, came across two dudes on the ground, one having the other in some sort of full nelson, half nelson, some sort of nelson. i asked if either needed help and the guy that seemed in control of the situation wanted us to call 911. at that point i realized how stupid this was, threatened to burn them with my cigarette and we got them up. they were roomates dressed in soccer clothes and really dumb and drunker than us. we got them going in opposite directions. some stupid things and tremendously decadent things, however, new york is inspiring. especially the subway. everyone so purposeful, so it appears at least. i hope i can bring that attitude back to tally with me.

wish i had a digital camera. couldn't write out all the neat things. it's good to have real evidence that his place exists, finally!

brave_ulysses @ 2008-04-28T03:49:00

2008-04-28T07:54:05Z

i feel guilty about this last year. it's my fault that nothing was done, i didn't step up to the role i was supposed to fulfill. however, i'm pretty sure things are figuring out, i'm starting to step into good times i believe, and we're going to accomplish what we need to and stay gold.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-08-25T18:38:00

2007-08-25T22:39:29Z

absolutely love my roomates. period. diplo and polyphonic spree tonight.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-06-06T19:19:00

2007-06-07T00:36:04Z

went to TCC orientation cause FSU's orientation doesn't want me. ran well on one hour of sleep. tired as hell now.

john got me this picasso print while in germany.

and thanks bud. put it to good use on my mirror.

if it's all about the reincarnation

2007-05-22T21:46:04Z

please please let me be a Lowly Worm next time around.

aint no thang onion rang

2007-05-21T16:58:48Z

hot fuss at the burger joint
some jukebox stomp of people in and out
busying away, loose change giggles along the floor
a chrome-clean establishment
we're reflecting badly, talking it up outside
chewing our tongues at each other in a ring-around
pickin fights and posies
greasy lips and breath mixing with the midnight vapors
should be at the water's edge, this beautiful mist
board some timeless skiff
smile as skipper yells at "big ole waves!"
constructive interference
drowns out our clamor of saying different things at the same time
(much more remarkable than when we said the same things at different times)
inside, french fries arch their backs all excrutiating
stinging at each other in some vat of hot oil

staying on the bandwagon

2007-05-10T17:04:56Z

man, the world changes so much. socially, culturally, physically. we personally change so much from day-to-day, even more from year-to-year. i've changed. i'm not the most traditional dude, however, i am moral, i do live to love, myself and all those around me. i try harder and harder to keep my mind open, to let information and experience enter and mix with less filters, and it's draining, in that it's difficult, but more and more i'm being fulfilled, because ultimately it's the easiest thing in the world. the world is entering very interesting times of drama as we all know, and things will keep on changing, just dramatically for a while. it may invite us to stick around when things cool down again, but we have to earn that invitation. God is out there, everywhere, in every nook and cranny of the natural world, in the less metaphorical nook and cranny's of the world we've raised and nourished, in everyone's noises, organized and instinctual, in their books and songs and probably especially their dances. in their faces. why ignore all that? why ignore God? He's within us as well, all individually equal, but also individually equal to the sum. and i'm not advocating abandoning God within us, the thing is it's so easy for some of us to listen to ourselves while drowning out everything, and for some of us it's just the opposite. it seems like it should be an equal partnership, equal mixin's. we built cubicles, not Him. He put us here naked and open. i want to stop feeling my head in the clouds so much. ATTENTION BRIAN, there's a heaven here too!

it would be easier if it wasn't my place to discuss this. again, i'm not the most traditional guy, and i'm not the most untraditional guy, but what real traditions have survived this long anyways? fear and love and art and the holy. it'd be easier if it wasn't my place, it'd be no one's and we wouldn't fight. but seriously, we're all living in the same place.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-05-05T14:28:00

2007-05-05T18:31:52Z

good good good show. IWO did good. trashound did good. awesome color fried my face. my ears are ringing with pitches of some weird mode, i'll be deaf soon. yesterday was hilarious, thanks everyone.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-05-04T11:42:00

2007-05-04T15:43:40Z

HAHAHA

go to the show!

brave_ulysses @ 2007-05-03T13:11:00

2007-05-03T17:17:15Z

was hazy surreal at lincoln park, golden moon in destin, vague and overwhelming good touch. all at the same time, in no time. memory's funny motion. a fragrant phantom on roller skates.

longer than i'd like, and a little cutesy, but kind of neat

2007-04-25T17:10:20Z

wake up, warm morning,
but the damn sun hurts my eyes. it's in my face up on the 19th floor.
it floats out past everyone's windows, attentive and unaware.
it's just there, eye to eye with my bright, clean reflection.
hurts again! hard to concentrate! tip-toeing, from pits of tar-hot thought, down stairs to a real world.
enough fooling, focus on the day.
but it's down here too! i'm bouncing and wheeling in fast times, and i can't look at anything because damn Sun reflects off everything.
i should be scurrying free down here on the street, but instead i'm pinballing away from point to point of piercing glare.
they fall everywhere,
in front of me and on top of me, as if from trees.
i'm soaking from drip and drop of wet, golden shine.
but then a nice memory of kid times in the woods, with our tongues stuck out,
rolling with the bugs in damp leaves on wet, sunny days when it lit the rain like
falling stars in the afternoon.
how Mom really loved to see our crazy faces in the mud!
playing in the mud, resting in the mud, with everyone and everything of all-time.
it's so easy to think about ending up in there, sometimes.
a rested mind, calm forever, throughout all the earth's successes and failures.
calm through those aggravated era's of immense heat and pressure,
when the world throws a tectonic fit in violent and crumbling motion.
until i reemerge in the bright light, shining thankful with an eternity of love and understanding.
we'll see the sun and be the sun, all in each other's faces,
radiant diamonds sprawled along the mountains and deserts and green grasses.
the shimmering oceans.

he don't use tissues, or his sleeve. he don't use napkins or any of these.

2007-04-19T00:25:15Z

well damn, i just locked myself out of my bathroom. should save worry on showering, toothbrushing, and all other clean things.

had good times this past weekend. musics and breakfast in sarasota with nathan and the new college kids, then to gainesville for matt's 22nd, then the lips the following night for free. intense experience with an amplified brain, awesome light and sound and body-groovin's framed by the occasional wind gust whipping over my head. good community, everyone getting fully behind something bizarre and sometimes incomprehensible. i saw a beach ball from about 30ft whip and warble my way till it found my face and i exploded and it was hilarious and great. kyle's house after that, huddling around a warm orange bouncy ball, tasting pink and a brief game of jenga. had a talk with rylan about inspiration(or the lack thereof) and, fittingly, arrived at the most magnificent dead end. so completely deflating at first, but amazing and liberating in the realization of how glaring and glorious that dead end was. all good, quiet reflection on the drive back to orlando. the whole time was like cool water and i'm feeling good for finals and a busy summer.

i want to be cool with this

2007-04-12T17:11:02Z

"I have a friend who feels sometimes that the world is hostile to human life- he says it chills us and kills us. But how could we be were it not for this planet that provided our very shape? Two conditions- gravity and a livable temperature range between freezing and boiling- have given us fluids and flesh. The trees we climb and the ground we walk on have given us five fingers and toes. The "place" (from the root "plat", broad, spreading, flat) gave us far-seeing eyes, the streams and breezes gave us versatile tongues and whorly ears. The land gave us a stride, and the lake a dive. The AMAZEMENT gave us our kind of mind. We should be thankful for that, and take nature's stricter lessons with some grace."

-Gary Snyder

brave_ulysses @ 2007-04-10T14:31:00

2007-04-10T18:39:28Z

eww, don't shun your peoples and don't shun your inspirations. it's cheesy. they're all good for ya, don'tshunno?

and grindhouse is really really fun.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-04-07T22:35:00

2007-04-08T03:02:32Z

ah yes. to toast evenings of warmytummy misunderstandings, cheap(deep) relations, and smiles.

drinkdrank slippin' down, hot riverdown.
with a firebelly i'll slurp sippin' spit speak,
churnin' earth inyourinnerearinyourinnerearinyourinnerear forever.
haha, my bad. yeah yeah.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-04-04T09:53:00

2007-04-04T13:59:10Z

i have the feeling that my parents think i'm burning out. i need to be less private with them.

she loves to perform acrobatic tricks

2007-03-27T17:07:42Z

god damn, i can't leave the hippy skirts alone

i'm goin' down the road to feeling bad, and i ain't gonna be treated this'a way

2007-03-23T15:30:20Z

our power went yesterday morning for about two minutes. the clocks were messed up enough. there's a little red light on my alarm that signifies whether i'm living in the morning or the night, but most of the time it feels the same. however, the alarm doesn't work if it thinks you're trying to wake up in the evening. i woke up with a bad dream, i had something terminal, but curable and my parents let me die in bed. made me sad. it woke me up just early enough to catch my second class of the day, but i had an exam in my first class. my gpa might be shot, but when i went out on the porch after all that, to take a breather(or a cigarette), the air was comfortable and ladybugs were skittering around all over the place.

brave_ulysses @ 2007-03-22T11:54:00

2007-03-22T15:54:56Z

dang

maybe after he's gone, she'll come back, love me again

2007-03-21T17:42:16Z

grazing free along the greases of a butter breeze
thoughts organized into units of timid melody: pawing the water
units within units within units, teedee!
squares rearranged, sloppily circular dodecagons and fields of green,
the Greece's and columns
banners, streamers
STREAMING
neons run alongside upside crosseyed,
but faltering and phasing, failing
we're electric carcinogens,
the planet's blistered love

and so we came and went

brave_ulysses @ 2006-06-07T10:44:00

2006-06-07T16:25:38Z

i haven't updated in a while. summer has been very fun, especially fun. i think the reason that this summer has defined itself, both immediately and deeply, over all others, is the noticeable changes. all these different causes being put into effect that couldn't be reproduced on a spring break tee. of course college is a big one, it more than any other looms over this summer, but not in an intimidating way. i feel like i'm slightly displaced, at the edge of some great groove that i've been apart of. i can still enjoy its comforts indirectly, i still belong to this atmosphere, but i'm also able to peek upon this previously disregarded plane and it excites me. college looms only because i've been bobbing around in this dimple. it looms involuntarily, from natural elevation, with a neither welcoming nor shunning(just mysterious) radiance. so i suppose it's up to me whether or not i want to make the experience a positive or negative one.

in the dimple, i've enjoyed some beautiful people. stone and i are on a string, stretched tight with springs at the end. we balance zen-like, not precariously, with smiles. we're not necessarily walking the string to some unknown destination, we just like bouncing and seeing how high we can get. we're going to chicago with jared and nathan and i couldn't be more excited. travelling to such a place has to be good for you. and multivitamins, sean has been giving me some and i feel great, though i know it might be all in my head, i'll use any excuse. good good. i spent 666 with ramey, angela, ethan, jill, and kent and we had a good time, yes. we went and saw the omen, yes, and then played cranium at ethan's. kent and i commanded the game until the very end, damn early french garden design with its rigid qualities. and so on.

blather is proper

2005-08-18T04:15:08Z

jeff left.
last night we were all looking at pictures and i noticed that in every single picture, save one or two, i had on my blue 58th fighter squadron t-shirt with the big, king kong, gorilla dude on it. if you know me at all, you know this shirt. also in every single picture jeff makes almost the exact same face and will wright always looks fucking cool. always. the past 3 years have been pretty consistent, so thoughts of college and all that real world jazz are scaring me. i know i want to be poor and happy and i know how to get to chicago, but what if that changes? or will i be disappointed if it doesn't? will i still have my shirt? will i still love sly & the family stone?

double bass lessons next wednesday :)

hmm, hmm...

2005-07-22T04:39:19Z

i go to sleep every morning and wake up at seinfeld.
does that make me an early bat?

no, ^^that makes me a dork.